When you tell people you’re single, it feels like you become a problem for them to solve. “Oh,” they say with poorly disguised pity, “well, that’s cool.” But it’s not cool, because they’ll say, “So, why aren’t you dating?” Even my own ex-boyfriend (we broke up 6 months ago and are attempting to be friends), asked me why I’m not dating. And the only answer I have for all these concerned individuals, is that I hardly ever meet anyone I want to date. Next comes the inevitable question: “Have you tried online dating?”
No, I haven’t. I know it’s the thing to do these days. I know that everyone and their mom is doing it so there’s no stigma anymore. I know that a lot of people doing it have the same doubts about it as I do so I’m not alone, and blah, blah, BLAH.
I think it’s cool and really brave for other people to online date, but it has never felt right for me. I just can’t get over how unnatural and forced it feels. I was embarrassed trying to come up with a dating profile headline (I settled on, “Can we say we met at a baseball game or cooking class or something?”), and trying to find things to say about myself that don’t sound corny, cliché, or just plain stupid.
And do guys even read profiles? My suspicion is that from the 15 “winks”, 10 emails, and 5 IM chat requests I got within a few minutes of signing up, maybe 2 of those guys actually went beyond just looking at my pictures, because I hadn’t even finished writing the text parts of my profile yet.
But, who knows? Maybe this will become one of those things you resist for a long time then end up loving it (although I 99% doubt it). The best part of this is that if nothing comes of it, it’s totally okay. Believe it or not (most people don’t), I’m just fine with being single.