New thing #26: Sketch & Updates


Instead of the typical card and cake, my boss asked if I wanted to do a “new thing” for my work birthday celebration. I thought of going out for ice cream, and she suggested we go to Sketch down the street from our office (which happens to be across from the Sierra Nevada tasting room). They are known for their made in-house daily, organic ice cream, and offer more unusual, “boutique” kinds of flavors (I got the vanilla lavender swirl). It was nice to get a small break from the rain, take a walk, and move the work birthday ritual out of the office for a change.


Also, today my friend Jamie took me out to lunch for my birthday and gave me this awesome card. She said it made her think of my new things project.










Some people have been asking how certain things are going, so here are a few updates:

  • One of the brides from the Narnia wedding commented on the blog when she got back from her honeymoon, and I was stoked that she seemed happy with it.
  • I’m only on page 110 of War & Peace. I hope to catch up after this crazy busy month is over.
  • I was happy to see that the acts of kindness seemed to be spreading. A couple weeks ago someone left change in an envelope taped to our work vending machine. Written on the envelope: “The next one is on me.” Also, more co-workers ended up reading the blog than I anticipated, so at least one of the “anonymous” card recipients found out it was me who gave it to them. Oh well, you can’t expect anything to be kept secret once you put it on the internet.
  • I haven’t been back to BodyCombat class. I’ve barely been to the gym this month at all. Come April I plan to make a full comeback!
  • Mom and I watched our episode of Dance Party. We got on camera a decent amount, but I was surprised by how lame my dancing was, or should I say, my standing around. In my head I thought I was dancing, but on TV, I look like I’m barely moving! Maybe I was more nervous than I realized? I think the only way I would go back is to redeem myself. Go big or stay off the dance floor people!
  • I still want to stop on Frontage Road every day when I drive by it. I might have to start walking there once a week.
  • I got my official acceptance letter from Make-a-Wish! I go to the first volunteer training in May.
  • I found out today on our ice cream outing that apparently there is a lot of controversy surrounding Bay Street. The mall was built on an ancient Ohlone Indian burial ground. Since 2001 the Ohlone descendants host a “don’t buy anything day.” I hope that wasn’t the day I chose to shop there, yikes!
  • So far is and is not what I expected. I did expect it to feel artificial and forced. What I didn’t expect was how often I would have to ignore people. I thought I could just join, and kind of scope it out for a while, but the site has been livelier than that. I’m constantly getting emails, likes, “winks,” and match updates (I understand this is a typical woman’s experience with this site, so if you like this kind of attention, this is the place for you). Messages like “hey beautiful,” I’m okay ignoring. Some are unintentionally funny (“your eyes exude passion and wisdom…”), but some guys have written some really thoughtful and clever emails. None of them are people I would be interested in meeting/dating though (some due to distance, sorry but I’m not driving to Palo Alto to meet you for coffee), so it’s hard to decide if I should write them back. I would love to thank them for putting effort into their attempts, but it feels like leading them on.
  • I haven’t received my DNA testing kit, but I can’t wait!
  • I mentioned having a crush in my facial post, but people can stop asking about it. It’s clearly an unrequited crush, so there will likely be no interesting updates there.
  • My tattoo is healing nicely. It actually didn’t really need to heal at all, being that it was so small. I still love it, and it already feels like a part of me.


New thing #17:

73339538380254b0d415bd05afda4bdbOnline dating is a good example of something I put on my new things list that I have never wanted to do. Repeat to self… “out of my comfort zone, out of my comfort zone…”

When you tell people you’re single, it feels like you become a problem for them to solve. “Oh,” they say with poorly disguised pity, “well, that’s cool.” But it’s not cool, because they’ll say, “So, why aren’t you dating?” Even my own ex-boyfriend (we broke up 6 months ago and are attempting to be friends), asked me why I’m not dating. And the only answer I have for all these concerned individuals, is that I hardly ever meet anyone I want to date. Next comes the inevitable question: “Have you tried online dating?”

No, I haven’t. I know it’s the thing to do these days. I know that everyone and their mom is doing it so there’s no stigma anymore. I know that a lot of people doing it have the same doubts about it as I do so I’m not alone, and blah, blah, BLAH.

I think it’s cool and really brave for other people to online date, but it has never felt right for me. I just can’t get over how unnatural and forced it feels. I was embarrassed trying to come up with a dating profile headline (I settled on, “Can we say we met at a baseball game or cooking class or something?”), and trying to find things to say about myself that don’t sound corny, cliché, or just plain stupid.

And do guys even read profiles? My suspicion is that from the 15 “winks”, 10 emails, and 5 IM chat requests I got within a few minutes of signing up, maybe 2 of those guys actually went beyond just looking at my pictures, because I hadn’t even finished writing the text parts of my profile yet.

But, who knows? Maybe this will become one of those things you resist for a long time then end up loving it (although I 99% doubt it). The best part of this is that if nothing comes of it, it’s totally okay. Believe it or not (most people don’t), I’m just fine with being single.